She Thought, Gravely
by frenchpuppycormier
Summary: One-shot that takes place in 5x20 during the funeral scene and after. Basically, it's how I envisioned it going and playing out. It steers away from canon, obviously, but I tried my best to fit with the characters. Hook is in the story-sorry-but for reasons that are pertinent to the context of the whole thing. It is for sure a SQ story though, so don't worry guys :D
Emma felt sick. Everything that's happened thus far has been her fault. At least that's what she thinks. Her mom keeps telling her it isn't her fault, but she knows better. If it weren't for her, Robin would more than likely still be alive. She looked over at Regina. Emma swallowed thickly the bile rising in her throat. _I'm such an idiot_ , she thought. Regina is going to hate me. But who cares what she thinks about me? I need to let her grieve.

Here they are now, standing over Robin's grave. Of course it's drizzling outside, it's only fitting. Emma walked over to Regina and quietly took a hold of her hand, and squeezed, reassuring her she was here if she needed someone. Regina squeezed back. Without looking at Emma, Regina softly rested her head on Emma's shoulder. Emma returned the favor by resting her head on Regina's.

"I need you to be okay," Emma said, with tears in her eyes.

Regina shifted her head to stare at Emma. "I will be. With time."

Emma couldn't hold in her guilt any longer. "Regina, this is all my fault. You lost another love because I was an idiot and dragged you down to the Underworld. I can't-I-I-I can't-I can't breathe." Emma clutched her chest.

Regina placed her hands on the sides of Emma's face, and she slowly calmed down. "Emma, what you did….yes, it was a dumb thing to do, but I went down there by choice. It's not completely your fault."

Emma sniffled. She put her hands on top of Regina's and looked at her with teary disdain. "You're an amazing person, Regina. I don't deserve your kindness."

Regina guffawed. "I'll see you later, Emma." She gave Emma a hug and then walked away to meet up with Snow and Henry. Emma was left alone by Robin's grave.

Emma knelt down in the grass. She closed her eyes and wept. Her life was a never-ending rollercoaster. Sure, having ups and downs was normal, but for Emma it's never _been_ normal. Her ups can get really high and then all of a sudden she'll go down, but so far down that she doesn't even know how she manages to get back up. Sometimes she'll be too depressed to eat and instead she'll drink herself to sleep, to numb the pain.

"Robin, I don't even know where to begin. Personally, I didn't know you very well, we never really talked, but you were a man with fairly good morals. You treated Regina right, which is honestly the most important thing, to me. I just hope, in the end, that she's all right. That's all I care about. _She's_ all I care about. As long as _she's_ happy, _I'm_ happy."

Emma thought she should say something else. "Wherever you are, I hope you're in a better place. Maybe you've reunited with Marian. You deserve that much. I promise, if I can, I'll look after Roland when the Merry Men aren't able to. I was an orphan once so I know what he's going through. Anyway, again, I'm sorry it came to this. None of this was supposed to happen."

She stood up and as she was placing another arrow on his coffin, she felt a whoosh of air come from behind her.

"Swan?"

That voice. How is that possible? She swallowed her fear and slowly turned around. What she saw was physically impossible. Hook! Hook? "How are you here? Why are you here?"

Hook lavishly grinned. "Zeus brought me back for helping kill Hades."

Emma jump hugged Hook. "I'm glad you're okay. Some of us weren't so lucky." She let go of Hook and looked over at Robin's grave.

Hook let go of his smile. "Aye. Nothing's fair."

"Hook, you've come back from the dead. Twice now, once being my doing. As much as I appreciate and thank my lucky stars you did, Regina will be devastated. She's gonna hate me," Emma hung her head.

"Well, she's gonna find out sooner or later. Just don't flaunt it, and maybe she'll get over it," Hook said.

Emma rolled her eyes. "I just hate how this is happening to her all over again."

Hook gave her a hug. "She'll be alright. Given time."

* * *

Regina finished giving Snow a hug, and as she looked over her shoulder, what she saw frightened her. "I'll meet you guys at the diner." She gave Henry a kiss on the head and gave Snow's hand a squeeze.

Snow smiled. "We'll see you later." Henry and Snow walked away to find David, and they piled into the truck and drove away with the others.

As soon as Regina saw that they had left, she looked over at Robin's grave. Emma was standing there talking to herself. When she got closer, she saw that Emma was frozen still, her head tilted down, and not moving. "Hey, Emma, are you okay? Whom were you taking to?" No answer. Regina grabbed her arms and shook her. "Emma." Still no answer. Then she tilted Emma's head and gasped with fear. Emma's eyes were bloodshot and dark around her eyelids. "Emma!" Regina pleaded. "Honey, snap out of it!"

Emma shot her head up and let out a loud gasp. "Ughh. Uh uh. What happened?"

"I don-

"Where's Hook?" Emma asked.

Regina was puzzled. "Emma, Hook's dead."

Emma stared at her quizzically. "No, no, no. He's here. I just-I just saw him. He's here."

"Emma! Did you not hear me? Your boyfriend is dead and so is _mine_. Get used to it!" Regina yelled.

Emma flinched at her words. "I don't understand. He was just here a minute ago."

Regina was so angry she needed to strangle someone. She just lost someone and _now_ Emma wanted attention? Ugh. She really needed to get out of this town and go on a long vacation or something. Take Henry and just relax. Fiji maybe. Italy, Rome, or even Mexico. Who cares, as long as she's out of this godforsaken place!

Regina quickly composed herself and took a deep breath. "Emma, you have been through a great deal of stress. We _all_ have. Come on, I'll take you home. You're in no condition to drive." Regina put her arm around Emma's shoulders and walked her to her car. Regina thought about poofing them to Emma's house, but thought it'd be best to drive. She doesn't want Emma getting sick on her now.

When they got to the house, Emma looked like she was going to pass out. "Thanks for the ride. Sorry for being such a nuisance. And if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always here. Anyway, I guess I'll see you around," Emma touched Regina's hand and got out of the car.

"Emma, wait," Regina got out of the car, with tears in her eyes. "Losing Robin hit me like a ton of bricks because it reminded me so much of losing Daniel, but….I can't lose you too. Please take care of yourself."

Emma smiled, walked over to Regina, and gave her a warm hug. "I'm so sorry Regina. For everything." She pulled away, "I don't want to lose you either."

"Would you be up for coming to Granny's with me? With everyone else? For Robin…." Regina implied.

"Anything for you, Regina."

They got back in the car and drove to the diner. Regina knew getting over Robin's death was going to be a painful ride, but with Henry and Emma by her side, she felt it would be a little _less_ painful.

* * *

That night Regina had a hard time getting to sleep. Her and Robin didn't always sleep together-he liked being in the forest-so going to sleep without him wasn't always hard, but now that she knew he was gone for good, sleep felt foreign to her. She needed a warm body next to her. Henry was at the apartment tonight with Emma's parents and Neal. He thought Regina would like some space. She thought she needed it too, but boy was she wrong.

Across town, Emma was falling asleep when she heard shuffling downstairs in the kitchen. She quickly threw on a sweatshirt and ran down the stairs to see what all the noise was about. Once she got to the kitchen and turned on the lights, she gasped. "Hook. What are you doing here? Why did you just leave without me at the cemetery?"

"Sorry, love. I went to go see what the crocodile was up to. No one saw me though," Hook replied.

"Well you could've let me know. Regina thought I was going insane, she thought I was imagining you," Emma said.

"I don't blame her. No one knows I'm alive yet, except for you," Hook stated.

Emma smiled. "Yeah, I guess. So, what are you doing here?"

"I just came to see if you were doing okay without me," Hook crossed his arms.

Emma rolled her eyes. "I'm sleeping just fine, if that's what you're asking. See ya tomorrow?"

"Aye," Hook kissed her cheek and left.

As soon as he left, Emma heard a banging on the front door. "What now?" she muttered. She opened the door and Hades was standing on the other side, with Robin, getting ready to kill him. "No!" she screamed. While she was screaming, she heard more knocking, and she suddenly shot up from the couch and gasped for a breath of air. "It was all just a dream?" she asked herself. No. It couldn't be. Hook felt too real, she thought.

The knocking continued. It was two in the morning, who could be here at this hour of the night? She opened the door and found, this time, Regina on the other side.

"Regina. What are you doing here?" Emma asked. "Are you okay?" Emma reached out and touched her cheek.

"I couldn't sleep," Regina groggily replied.

"That makes two of us. C'mere," Emma pulled Regina in for a hug. "You can stay here if you want. Anything you need."

Regina's eyes filled with tears. "Is it okay if I sleep with you? I don't think I can fall asleep alone." They pushed apart.

Emma felt terrible for Regina. She looked so distraught and terrified and small. "Of course." Emma grabbed her hand and walked Regina up the stairs and into the bedroom.

"Just make yourself comfortable," Emma said. "There's plenty of room." Emma got under the covers and waved Regina over.

Regina slowly made her way to the other side of the bed and took off her coat. Then she slid under the covers and laid down, facing Emma. "Goodnight."

Emma smiled and reached over and tucked Regina's hair behind her ear. "Goodnight, Regina."

* * *

Early in the morning, Regina woke up to the pitter-patter of rain on the window. She opened her eyes and saw that she had her arms wrapped around Emma and her head was resting on her chest. She tilted her head up to see if Emma was still sleeping. Regina could kind of see that Emma's eyes were open, so she assumed she was awake.

"Good morning," Regina said, huskily. She unraveled herself from Emma and sat up. "I'm sorry if I got too close to you. I guess I like to cuddle in my sleep."

A few moments passed and Emma still hadn't said anything. "Emma? Are you awake?" Regina touched Emma's face and moved it so she was facing her. "Oh my god!" Regina was horrified. Emma's eyes were open, but it looked like she was dead; she wasn't moving or blinking. She had dark circles around her eyes, which were yet again, bloodshot.

Regina shook her. "Emma, wake up. Please!" She didn't know what to do, she was freaking out. So she did what anyone would do, she slapped Emma in the face. "Wake up!" However, Emma still wouldn't move. Regina ran to the bathroom, filled up a cup with water, and came back into the bedroom. "Please forgive me for this." She then splashed the cold water on Emma's face.

"Gah-uh ugh!" Emma coughed and wheezed. She shot up and immediately wiped her eyes. "What the hell was that for?"

"Oh thank goodness," Regina was relieved. "Your eyes were open but you weren't awake. I thought you were dead."

"So you poured water on me? What made you think that would work?" Emma asked.

Regina hesitated before answering. "I didn't."

Emma looked about ready to strangle her. "You know what, it doesn't matter. I appreciate your help. No matter how ridiculous it was." Emma wasn't ready to tell Regina that she wasn't asleep, but that she was with Hook. Or at least, she thought she was. _Shit, what if I'm going insane_ , she thought.

Regina put on her coat and pulled Emma out of bed. "I think you need some fresh air. Want to go for a walk?"

Emma nodded. "Let me get dressed and I'll meet you downstairs."

Regina squeezed Emma's hands and then left the room. Once she was gone, Emma walked to her closet and picked an outfit to wear. When she turned around she ran into someone. "Oof."

It was Hook.

"Swan. Watch where you're going," Hook said.

"Me? I didn't even know you were in here. Where in the hell did you come from?"

Hook tried not to laugh at the words she just said. "Well, hell for one thing."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Not funny. No, I'm serious. How do you keep popping up out of nowhere?"

"What do you mean? Regina let me in," Hook clarified.

"Oh. Well we're going for a walk, so I'll see you later then," Emma replied.

"Aye. I'll see you later," Hook left the room.

Once he shut the door, Emma released a breath she didn't know she was holding. _Okay, gotta get dressed,_ she thought. She slipped on a pair of leggings and a sweater. She heard Regina yelling from downstairs asking if she was okay. "Coming!" she replied.

When she found Regina she smiled. "So, where are we going, your majesty?"

Regina grabbed Emma's hand and led her to the door. "It's a surprise."

About fifteen minutes later, they arrived at a forest with a walking trail. Emma has been almost all over Storybrooke and she never knew about this place? Looking far down into the dank, dark, forest, Emma gulped. "Looks…..looks great."

Regina looked at her suspiciously. "What?"

"Honestly, it's a little creepy," Emma laughed. "Where does it go?"

"It's just a path that goes around the park. It only looks creepy cause of all the trees, but I promise you it's safe. Do you trust me?" Regina asked.

"Of course."

Regina pulled Emma toward the path. "Then let's go."

As they were walking, Emma couldn't help but realize what this place must mean to Regina. "Did you go here a lot with Robin?"

Regina breathed a heavy sigh. "Yeah, I guess. We used to come out here a lot in our free time. Personally, I didn't like it too much, but now…."

"It reminds you of him?"

"Yeah. It's comfortable, I guess."

Emma hooked her arm with Regina's and pulled her close. "It's peaceful. The birds singing, the whistle of the wind between the trees, I can understand how it draws you in."

Regina smiled in contempt. A few moments passed and Emma grew nervous. She had to ask her about Hook. "So, you saw Hook earlier then? When you let him in?"

Regina stopped dead in her tracks and grew solemn. She didn't know what to do. "Emma, Hook isn't here. We left him in the Underworld, remember?"

Emma paced back in forth. "What? No. No. Th-this can't be happening. I just saw him before we left. H-he's alive."

Regina treaded carefully. "Where did you seem him, exactly?"

"At the house and at the cemetery. Right after Robin's funeral," Emma eyed Regina.

"But he's dead, Emma. He never came back."

Emma grew impatient and thought she was going to burst. "Then why do I keep seeing him?! Regina! Wh-why do I seem him everywhere I go? I can touch him and feel him. I think? No, no, no, what's happening to me?"

Emma was breaking down and there was nothing Regina could do about it. She crumpled to the ground, but before she could fall, Regina caught her and sat them both on the ground. Emma wouldn't stop shaking, so Regina held her close and rubbed her back. "It's okay, Emma. I'm here. I'll be here for as long as you need."

Emma wiped away her tears. "But _I'm_ the one who's supposed to be here for _you._ You just lost someone. _Again._ How can I be so selfish?"

"That's life. You live and you lose," Regina frowned. "I just happen to be a magnet to horrible things." In that moment, everything came rushing back in a tidal wave of emotion. She started to cry. Emma joined in. There they sat, in the middle of the forest, clutching each other and praying that things would soon be better.


End file.
